Joke Of The Day

[Corzza]

Two Elderly Gents Decided They Were Close To Their Last Days And Decide To Have A Last Night On The Town. After A Few Drinks, They End Up At The Local Brothel.

The Madam Takes One Look At The Two Old Geezers And Whispers To Her Manager, 'go Up To The First Two Bedrooms And Put An Inflated Doll In Each Bed. These Two Are So Old And Drunk, I'm Not Wasting Two Of My Girls On Them. They Won't Know The Difference. ‘

The Manager Does As He Is Told And The Two Old Men Go Upstairs And Take Care Of Their Business.

As They Are Walking Home The First Man Says, ‘you Know, I Think My Girl Was Dead!'

'dead?' Says His Friend, 'why Do You Say That?'

'well, She Never Moved Or Made A Sound All The Time I Was Loving Her.’

His Friend Says, 'could Be Worse I Think Mine Was A Witch. ‘

‘a Witch ??. Why The Hell Would You Say That?’

'well, I Was Making Love To Her, Kissing Her On The Neck, And I Gave Her A Little Bite, Then She Farted And Flew Out The Window... Took My Teeth With Her!’

[Corzza]

They always ask at the doctor's reception why you are there, and you have

to answer in front of others what's wrong and sometimes it is embarrassing.

There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her

what is wrong with you, in a room full of other patients.

I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy

handled it.

A 75-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the

desk.

The Receptionist said, 'Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today**

?'**

'There's something wrong with my dick', he replied.

The receptionist became irritated and said, 'You shouldn't come into a

crowded waiting room and say things like that. '

'Why not, you asked me what was wrong and I told you,' he said.

The Receptionist replied; 'Now you've caused some embarrassment in this

room full of people.

You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something

and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private.'

The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a roomful of

strangers if the answer could embarrass anyone.

The man walked out, waited several minutes, and then re-entered.

The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, 'Yes??'**

'There's something wrong with my ear,' he stated.**

The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her

advice.

'And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?'

'I can't piss out of it,' he replied.

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

Mess with seniors and you're going to lose!

[Corzza]

THE BLONDE WHO HUNTED ALLIGATORS:

A BLONDE JOKE THAT YOU'VE NEVER HEARD BEFORE

After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers,

the young blonde declared,

'Well, then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and Get a pair of alligator shoes for free!'

The shopkeeper replied with a sly smile, 'Well, little lady, why don't you go give it a try?'

The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, and spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the murky water,

shotgun in hand.

He saw a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her.

With lightning reflexes, the blond took aim, shot the creature and hauled it up onto the slippery bank.

Nearby were 7 more dead gators all lying belly up.

The shopkeeper watched in amazement as the blond struggled with the gator.

Then, rolling her eyes, she screamed in frustration......

Sonofabitch!! THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT, TOO!

[Panda Eyes]

[pkooistra]

..............................

[Ralph Wiggum]

^ are you a Queenslander?

[Ciaran]

^ are you a Queenslander?

[pkooistra]

.........................

Edited 12/04/12 11:15 AM by Ralph Wiggum

[MurdoK]

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop?

Dr Dre

[Howsee]

Bahahahahaha